Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Day 41: Emotional Roller Coaster Rides

Today was probably the first "bad" day that I've had since our arrival seven months ago. For the sake of my personal life, some things will be kept private, but I can shine a little light on a few things. 

Maddie and I attended a playgroup session held at a neighbor's lovely house. We try to go when we can so we can hang out with our friends that we otherwise will not see. 

Maddie had a rough time and was being pretty clingy. That just set everything else up for fun! As we were packing up to go she left me and made a run for the food table. She enjoyed eating her snack. She loves strawberries so she ate a few of those first. A few of our friends made us Valentines so Maddie got some sweet treats. 

Among various things for many reasons, I struggle with many different versions of mom guilt. I never feel like I do enough and I always feel like there should be more done. Do I work? Do I not work? A lot of questions come up and I feel guilty for even thinking the "wrong" answer. And why on Earth do I not engage in messy activities with my two year old?! Mom. Guilt. 

It's incredibly hard to live the life we do, but it's also enjoyable. I struggle with my days and decisions from time to time but the struggle of moving often is now beginning to drain our son. Caleb had a pretty good day but he still misses SC. He wants to move back "home" and get back to his old friends and schools. I am struggling with how I help guide him when all I wanted today was a Firehouse sub. Something so far beyond our reach! I can totally jump on his "let's go back to America" bandwagon. But, I want him to see what this place can offer him, too. 

He likes school and the friends he has outside of school but there's definitely ups and downs. 

For a nice dinner out we went to a lovely place and had some great food! I forgot to take a picture of the main course but it was all delicious. 
Water and my recommended glass of red wine. 
Shrimp appetizer. 

We're still adjusting quite a bit, but we keep remembering (especially on days like today) we have a lot of good days too. You're as happy as you choose to be. 

Maddie earlier in the day. 

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